Dishing the Dirt

January 8, 2016

This week the Star Magazine came out with an assistant "tell-all" story about some of the worlds most famous celebrities.
Here are some of the highlights:
• Lady Gaga is "helpless as a baby" and wakes up assistants in the middle of the night to change DVDs.
• Mariah Carey can't operate a microwave, and makes her assistant wash her hair in the shower.
• Matthew McConaughey gets "turned on by food."
• Kim Kardashian keeps all the fat she's gotten removed in a freezer, in case she wants it injected somewhere else.
Slacker was shocked that Mariah Carey doesnt know how to use a microwave and also makes other people wash her hair. He also said that Mathew McConaughey, who apparently gets turned on by food, must either always be hungry or is the type of guy who brings food into the bedroom. Slacker mentioned he was dating a woman once who tried this with avocadoes in his bed. 
Steve said that relationships are smushy enough, why bring avocadoes into a relationship? He went on to mention that Lady Gaga must be totally oblivious to the life around her since she wakes up her assistants in the middle of the night to change the DVDs in her player. Either that or she is lazy or rich (or all of the above).
Lil D said that Kim Kardashian keeps all the fat she removes from her body in the freezer to save it for future injections. Slacker freaked out and didnt want to even think about it, citing childhood trauma from hunting trips. Lil D speculated that Kanye probably just pushes the fat out of the way to get to the food.

Intern Scott