Slacker and Steve - OPP: Lazy Stay-at-Home-Mom 3/10

Thursday, March 10th

Adam is struggling with his wife who is a stay at home mom. He says she doesn’t seem to get anything done around the house such as laundry and cooking. Adam doesn’t understand why she struggles because two of the kids are in school half the day and the other naps a lot. He says he can get the garage clean when he watches them. He thinks she has a free pass in life and wants to know how to get her to stop complaining. What’s your advice?


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Steve. And mobile. Golf. Do you previously agreed to look. I don't. I don't know that you and I are gonna disagree about this system but I'm gonna say this. As inflammatory. Only human being as this person. Is going to be perceived dash cash and I personally believe there are some females listening to our show right now. They may actually agree with him. That's almost I mean. Not agree with everything he's saying. But I agree with him a little let's find out eEye guys. I think. But what's gonna stay at home mom for the last two years and I'm getting really tired of all the complaining she does. She constantly bitches about how tough it is and how she never gets any time to herself. Our two oldest kids are in school half the day. And the youngest team is always sleeping somehow though the laundry never gets done we ordered dinner most nights and how was that the racquet. It honestly can't be that hard I can managed had two of the kids and still get the garage cleaned on the weekend. How difficult is it to take two minutes and throw a load of laundry in the washer. Why is she struggling with this a bunch Conway dinner to stop complaining about basically getting any free pass in life. This is from Adam but at. Maybe nobody. Cool. I think I'm gonna say this I. I think being mother's heart I think there's a lot of things. That you pair her mom mom right. OK okay what no no I just don't you're right you're right you're you're right and I'm a man EE I think being a parent can be hard yes. But I I have also found myself in situations. Where. It's pretty easy to use the kids as an excuse to not get anything done on top where it's Ike. A lot of had a kids all day so that's why I didn't. Work out that's why I didn't do laundry that's why because you know I just chasing them around on that him. But after a certain age it's. And even even an almost any age I have I have some friends of mine. Who. Who really shown me how independent kids can be at a much earlier age and how. How actually healthy that is for them where people what do Lima. I mean they kinda they kind of do you there are things that the things you need to be done around their house and their kids kind of fend for themselves a lot of time I mean really in any given day. You know put a load of laundry and then. And even bring your kid into the laundry room or you can not to steal your living room Biden's not to be on top of them all day you have to sit next to them. And watch Winnie the toe with them. Mean it's good the you do sometimes but if you have other things to do why are you letting me I don't I learning from you I. I armed do. We have a friend to show and hit a his wife fought back to work and so he would become mr. mom take on the duties. And I think she. And I think he he. She says something about it comes down at time management he found that he was able to get. Late on a system a lot more whatnot you know. I I exceed that I mean. I think I yes I think it's easy to calm. Does it become just like. I'm just really nervous right now here's my thing. I don't normally when we read you know PP. We. Did you'll insight into the show we we kind of assume. We know who's going to call links we know what kind of people are gonna call and say. And we first read this might are both of us are gut instinct was well I mean we need this dead time in Dan's shell and if we do. Is just going to be his bloodbath yeah crucify the guy and and the more I thought about it. I had some time to think about it and I I truly believe that there are women who listened to our show who. I enemy be separate an easier but I I think there are women that keep you who listen who would call out other women. In say. Yet it's not it's not as hard as your making it seem Boca I remember when before my wife had kids. We would be around other stay at home moms. And she would be like. Then if I ever got the opportunity to stay home. House will be clean from ceiling to Florida Florida ceiling wall to wall I would be sick because I can work out whenever I want whenever kids or whatever. And then when you give any actual situation. It does snow quality of eighteen and in the friend to show you're talking about. If you can if you time management if you if you use time management things. That's no borrowing doesn't happen too was off OK if you still have you don't get behind as much her yes OK if you look. You either hi I see this you're either a victim. Or OK or not and so you either you either let your kids push you around. Or you push stem around and I did he not see any knees or I wake you either. He's the same nick cut so lakes through the water okay municipal water can guide you where so got you. I think in Adam's case is Weiss might be one of those people who's like Hamas. Well I mean I want you do you want everybody at a stinky diaper and then there Barack like two hours late. So he's got to find a delicate way to sit down with his wife and discussed. How old I think the delicate way is to come on the slider and she's going to have everybody flame throwing error or flame throwing and I have a few reasons for some throwing. Here's the thing he talks about they have three kids is the way to new edge of NASA's two oldest kids are in school has an Iranian this one as I was sleeping. On then he talks about how he can really kick some butt on the weekend. We DOS not chicken on the waiting in the garage clean everything that's so he's only got two of you. There's still that's true still one kid in the end so during the day or whatever she's got three after school so. I'd I'd never been more nervous three you know people who doesn't I don't know who's gonna call you I don't know if you guys are gonna be mad. Or you're gonna be on its. One but we just get out of the way that took months. Why don't feel like your normal. No but I'm just she's at a right. She his wife should stop complaining about her free pass in life you know for his Nordson. Or does Adam just not yet how incredibly hard it is to be a stay at home mom. Heidi we're using. I'd agree M ha. Has baton. And mom foremost in my children's lives to work anywhere between forty to sixty hours a week I get about 4:30 in the morning. And I find I'm do you have a laundry and generate my kids know how to claim the dog walk. I element now I don't need to sit around all day long well. Are you choosing her sitting around like he is. Getting around the hardly. Well yeah I mean you probably if the child not being should probably just do what I did that my kids are well but. I don't have time to get things iron. Pregnant have a my kid that I am I had that I don't have so. I found a time to make that happen I mean I would love having our day to get things done but it happened but it's done. So how can an Adam. He's eases its own talked to was why do you approach that. I eat now I don't know she worked full time before and after so maybe she was looking forward city. Breeden red arrows you know what ever but it. I he didn't need to be like you're not very Luke and his delivery at all. Through you know I don't mean to address the issue click that and they. And nobody but I mean there's an expectation he become a stay at home mom the job that absolutely job. Stat but an expectation. You know I mean I'm sure things were when you wish you working full time before. How are things getting done bad. Meaning morning I'm an actor she got home from work and it worked at the team I mean. You know I mean obviously that's up but getting them prior studies to be either more time available now I've got just my opinion but I may have magna may happen as her. Eighteen years. Well if it's real stink youth brings us. Lisa. Yeah I'd be nice to ease thanks. Well didn't return the Sevilla are having being at home mom that she needs that treat it like it job. So let's go to church until he can permit and I can't break learns. Even being Cheney could be treated like that church up. OK so let me just ask you this if that's your job. Couldn't who's your boss well together it's paying the bills. I mean I think I mean I mean seriously if the price yeah that's the reader to stay at home raising kids zen now that's. I don't know I know Steve you know in the war on paper and that's what it looks like but it's not do you think I can go on in my life and go. Would you do today. If she's a stay in Oman yeah kind of that was your agreement that's her job there are your jobs your she's gonna stay home you don't agreed I get to come home in question. Cornucopia of marriage act type guy because skinny kid that has got the catch up and claiming that it there's Skinner and have to take. Let it come under the baby. It it's a matter of cleaning and it's a little instead want to leave alone get a pap group. Around with fear as you can vacuum with a baby at Pappas became Gillick Andre you can get so many things. But she got to treat it like a job she needs to get actually need to have our schedule out so need to get it done well you company not a question machine at home what he needed it because it should be obvious. Right of right now she's not doing it so somebody and that would be a Boston most employment that places. Is going to have to push her to do the things you just said. So this CF to sit down and say. I think you need do. Right some priorities I think you need to look into getting a Pappas so you can vacuum while caring and like so cool he's going to save these things Tara does because if he sort of did his job she has every right to go what's your baseball what's your job and if she sees her right things with. His boss would sing it before she does. That's what makes this. I'm not disagreeing with you yet in the hierarchy when you look general paper. She would be the guy she's older models are no one byte has got to come from one relationship. That's a really tough thing we dole likes to move from like we're partners and we're in love him more co parenting. And now. But since now can own bills why isn't this crap cleaned back and we both agree to our jobs this is your job this is mine I don't see you doing your yeah I. I would not want the club total unlike they did have an agreement that she came home. And it does to house its than her job that she attributed her job. So they've already had that agreement in place she's not holding Kerr into the agreement they need to have an adult conversation is. This is here. Yeah I don't yet you're right Lisa I'm just saying friends personally. I couldn't have that conversation sometimes on the move from being partners to meet for at least that moment sort of pretending to be your mosque you know like you side we agreed you're gonna stay home and easier responsibilities. I it's I've never called anybody out on. I've been married more than once I never looked into my ex wife and went. Why do you missed it done so well it's a weird but someone is so so guy. Considered to be the boss and say why are you doing more stuff. While you're at home are. I. So what he would describe being our classic symptoms of depression and not being able to compete. Daily. Or laundry dishes can't pick. I think she need to talk to her doctor and get them out I think she she really looked good. She's gonna husband dug harder. Callous heartless when you sharing your arm and she's watching three did you visa postpartum suffer you just I mean that's a word Psycho analyzing somebody I'm. It's fairly mean I don't know how are younger littlest one noted that. I think there are not at their craft person but it hit the word that teenagers. And it it manifested in. Week out booted it manifested in higher. The lottery like everything that I like oh my god. Well I don't there's something going on. That can probably eat salt DeWitt with some help. And what did you do did you get on like medication or some. Yeah I saw my doctor Omar really great. Like it out there. On how he not everybody thought that I am doing laundry and cooking I am able to how can you do it but I just. It just wasn't I didn't care looked a little students need. You can fool yourself into thinking oh I'm just tired and they have these chips. And not really recognized that it but it really has hurt the depression. While good pouring thank you for the call I mean we've been we kind of slipped into about it but there must some me it's none but dining room. The U machine might just be lazy she's. Yes we could see after we a new L is a deadly to go for this big. Grandiose diagnosis and reduce disease she's saying I don't watch it means yeah. That puzzles is over another package of bond bonds and fire these other 20 lives. More you'll ask you come serial mom not his own house keeper of the black tiles that. The young guy but he is thanks. Much like that they don't mum her. All I have two hours alone with them what would you guy I go in Spain. Obama so I just got to appreciate. The heck out of it Oman it's. Well in more than a forty hour week job in Europe during your personal chef eerie nadir in their urine quandary. Hey here's. Both briefing under the pale guy Ortega wander out the CBI about 800 jobs. A senior DWIs and an annual saying he comes out and if we paid bums for everything their salary would be millions 640. He's out it's like yeah but. Shas. All day and we're not only did there each thing for little must unsealed do get DOS. So accelerates very Shasta and the salaries Ali okay and the whole sorry I. I'm not talking with zero moms. I don't agree you're you got a and it's a flight. There you know it's pretty low responsible Ehrlich Derek tickets early development plays a walking talking everything is you basically. You know I'd be dead it's it's not one job and you get paid for everything it got. You know they got it you gotta teach him how adept at spell out what colored had to go to after had a clean up after themselves. On top of taking care of yourself in house you know armed and soul you know I just yet I ordered full time job when I come home. I'm more than a little on the jump in and help the laundry clean up the dog crap outside whoever takes but I saw you know just because he. Teamed up at 6 AM you know every day he's up that night with her eight month old eating him. When I eat sleep and so. All you know it's just this. It's a full full 24 hour day jobs curbing the. My thank you for the call Carol we appreciate it I don't know I mean she's right here it's just thing. The disks it's yeah yeah if if I'm doing this over here then you've got to do that over the net income that's not just a kid just time management. Melanie. I what do you think. Personally I. While this is should I say. This shocking because we seriously tiptoed in here can we have armed go words outside the studio and you guys aren't mad at him right eats. And Perry have every right to be nervous about it because like I'm a child to stay at home mom well so my mom like I get a being a mom Judy hard. You agreed to now. I carried made entry can help. Lets me in my sister and been at. Eight years now my mr. no dad I'm Nick Collins. And she although the names change. Under even get done dinner never act. So she's kind of watching anybody should you do things and. She no I mean I'd AdWords and like I did a week all day she doesn't uncomfortable or clean Howell or how warm meal. So. You'd have no lobbied him out while. Oh OK on. I thank you for the call Melanie I Brazil's. I told you guys reasoned so I'm not. IA I think that's when she mentoring. About predates heat here can clean now and that is just content in the relationship. Move. Or are you are you in the same situation yourself. I am. New Zealand arm I heart you. And has direction and exchange. So actual during the day. And you're you're scheduled or tried weight and they are only how would you dates and then you start to tell our own Egypt. They don't hear it. And they are looking at launching it to get done and you do addition that he didn't yeah and I look at it saying I'm not your home and kind of the Camry. I yeah okay so you do you think she's just not hearing she's just trying to recount tradition is not complaining exactly she's just suggest this is what I got to dating exactly he sees it as always seizes complaining and what she didn't get that's that's not healthy right thank you Joseph. Armed. And now uncertain feel bad for America hello I wheeled off we've 68 or not but if you have any more advice for animal or his good for nothing stay at home ice Haley who is on the company's books dot com slash slacker and Steve seance.