Slacker and Steve - OPP: Daughter is a Bad Mom 8/3

Wednesday, August 3rd

Linda recently moved in with her daughter and her two children. After observing their home life, she is concerned about her daughter's parenting and its affect on her children. Her daughter is quick tempered and constantly yelling. Linda wants to inform her daughter that she needs to be better mother. How can she do this without creating more tension?
00:16:13

Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

Seen tons day. Right so let's talk about. Things are PP it's judging anybody parenting skills. Bad idea well they deserve though they're really that bad edits you gotta fight club somebody's got to come to rest. Strangers you should never all have the kid did a hearty good. I don't problem barge in and I know we deal with bobbled it's sometimes and we passed in jumping in on this stuff yeah I yeah. If a recently retired or moved in with. My daughter and her two children. She's a single mom so I thought she could probably use the help with the kids and around the house she frequently has outbursts thing gets upset about every little thing. She gets angry the housing clean even after I've done two loads of laundry the dishes and vacuum. She's always yelling at the kids and it really bothers me. She almost never talks to them almost has to yell at them for some thing. The kids have always had behavior issues and it's become very clear to me why flu though first remind me of the way her father used to act and that's why I left and got her away from him. I don't want this cycle to continue with my grandchildren. Should I consider down and tell her that she's not been a very good Marat. She needs to work on the way she interacts with her kids. I'm worried will cause more tension in the house but I also worry for my grand kids' future. What should I do misses for Linda. So Linda I never saw this until she moved and I mean that's a that's my first question it's a TD you know listeners right. And then mom okay mum moved in with daughter in the kids yet grass is a grim as living under their roof and their rules that. And that there there's and well Carol you're making the point well at all why does that matter if he doesn't know what we ask you this does it matter. I don't know if it does is she still have a place to kind of its share her opinion and judge and point fingers if she's there and she's helping right since she's going her way. More than this starter is. But it's Jimmy ask you this. I don't know your parents say this but. Okay extreme you're not allowed to critique your parenting style friends aren't allowed have a family your parents if they give you like advice and honesty that. While Mike you're doing it wrong or he sun one that you. Else safe to me. The things they say to me a lot. And it it does send me into a low or lose you did you say you're being too hard on him there being two won't do is punish him its sights. You know will go to their house and after what makes. My son Noah and and to a lesser semi but she's learning. From hand right sometimes they're very disrespectful. And they don't seem pleases and thank you resign. And then when they get around other people you've seen them like my kids will be respectful to me when he did around you. And they got to be the big man on campus right my son she. Add idiot and a light. You just to see is there doesn't you know knocked and it might put you win a corner rules still apply well. So you know I'll be talking my mom kind of postmortem after a visit out to their house or whenever. And I'll say. You know know his behavior was out of control I'm sorry my dies he's just to Ted. You're being too hard on in Honolulu. If you really didn't just lighten up. Water power and light. Mom do you remember that. Thank you never lightened up. I'm just I'm guaranteeing. So when I was spirited. So how dare you. Tell me he so light not. Now are they doing this from because were the grandparents now and everything's slowed in bringing those are probably okay or resist mom know how do you take that from your mom. You stop not go well like clam up. Okay do you would you self examine go well maybe your maybe not know this is just the way you parent do you find me as a person who takes criticism well absolutely. She you don't know why should I know it's so I haven't Danish court. I find ways to exactly everything. Well all of although I don't dude I I know it's still wrong reaction. Like. How do you. And knack of turning don't PP one thing to ask a PP most urgent personal problem it's fun. In my case I don't like being studied by anybody but you're right I should be more open to it. I don't know that these. This is one of those ones and I wish we could like dragon and a great many debater something. Because we are only getting one side she sang these outbursts and she's upset about every little thing and she's like. These aren't clean enough for whenever. Working their way and art house slobs messy week when the kids how to clean decides. Stairs and played spoke did you 12100 tenants who cleaner coal clean your room for we have these are the cleaner and then finally you're like. No ordinary start. Mom's side of the story is she's always snapping and on around her when Barack and mark grant it. Maybe in looks and we Cuba maybe the the the frustration is is built up a secure being too hard and Bob. Cut cut cut. My. Ladies and gentlemen Indies like currency guardians I would like to point something out about Steve what a wide Steve is a mastermind. When he signs are saying they can do understand they keep coming he can't remember what we talked about it last hour. When he finds some in me just understand like bamboo under fingernails I guarantee you six months from now he's gonna save me again. And getting hit him in the acquisition. Is like you do your mom yeah at the our dogs are. It anyway Linda oh yeah her from so many there is watching the grandkids and she thinks her daughter's taking it too far. She's already raised her kids. It's right she's Brady's. The mother of her grandchildren. Is this her time to come in and parent terse some more. Or is this the time where she stands back knows I did the best I commit her and she's gonna raise her kids her way. I do you kind of do we say and if if the daughter had moved into Linda's house she might have a little more leg to stand on Jay but no Shia desk in her home run. Guest Susan king for us you're still aghast general so how do which would trumps what now house rule but I don't I don't know who she bit but the Linda she's worried for the grandkids is futures she doesn't whine. She left. A husband who acted like Dexia to save her daughter from mess and now her daughter's doing the exact same bank should she stepped end should she step off what would you do. Nicole. Yeah I agree it's. Okay well I actually a single mom of 20 boy he's and I template but my parents are crying and I know I'm a hard being a single parent because you don't get a parade. But I think I'll tell having lived at my parents. For timing thing grandparent only eighteen he'll make you eager to their kid and I had like. They're acting up like these that their kids get. Full moon just happened. Now I mean I'd put a cabinet grandma made these fee income maybe she did we do you really need to break trying and at and a little bit more and I paint. Why don't you go take some time and let me lack which hit like a break you do. During one of the Al ourself because that's seals patronizing. And it makes. If she's telling kids go clean your room when you go what you want to turn delta why don't you go take a break your right it's the same standard as you're you're not seen the words future. Absolutely judging her dad moment and I would I would take that very offensive because the kids see that absolutely that somebody just try to. She had to wait in burlap origami like you know I think it frustrate it does take a break. I would say maybe at bat and made it doesn't change machines and I Alpert thing because if they haven't hater that she thought it could be. Get ready scared but they're going to be consequence of what their daughter if she does speak out. You call me ask you some real quick soliciting kids with Linda in Linda's parenting is way different from you know that their moms and and have to go back to the mom style and back to limit. I guess and they're gonna see the differences are pitting one against the other new do dad and do. Really because kids are Smart and not content Varian and I have to learn include dual air whack. I can't understand that my kids they're all under that right now so they understand Graham I have a different world than my. Have you out as so they do understand that because that's probably only a mammogram does house yeah its biggest snatch every twenty minutes and like. You get a snack every date in my house are snapped. It's like. My parents Sabatini jar they got to play a teeny dished the out of things don't candy bars an that they got granola bars appeared the ice cream sandwich is out there MIT is just make the rounds and might. No he's out and snacks is like not a must Xanadu OK so you can't go to your momma going he's got a totally have this I am. How humans and I doesn't sound so young and that's tough thank you really comical. Rose. I but he thanked. I think meg very remind you can sit down with her daughter. And about my day jail. Sounds like there's some real problems going on there and I can you need each professional help and that's only gonna bench with the children. Do you think this so mama's gonna be on board I I see the mom just going ten times worse look down on grass suggesting meaning you go to therapy is never Z. Well you know maybe grandma can say I saw that happen with your father and I'm coming from a great. Love and care green and I wanna keep it backed review in the kit Kat that's Machida really looking far right that's true I am. Kansas is there really isn't an issue and grandma being too sensitive battle be pretty evident and Eric gay I mean this happened the night and eight and two. He pretty much beat an intervention and got my sister help and she's a much better parent how. Wow seems she didn't take you back did you take it batted first or. She did okay and it. I am she'd get the whole you don't understand abstract Diane yeah you are yellow highlight on the day today each element to all said and done. When someone wants the best for your children you kind of have to be that you know you to go outside your ex cal. Wealth and it's a good point yeah. Thank you danger not I it's all it's an odd and I go back to its own the timing if you if you suggest Derek beat you suggest she's calmed down any of those things. While she's down a little bit better it's your John yeah she's in the volume kicked our guests it's like retired no the but I do an apartment. Pam if yeah I guy who he thinks. Well teenage driver question why the grandmother I why did she not related to behavior previously TN. Eighty army because he added stretch heard another person being under their rooms. Oh there is she just cause she could be contributing to the behavior and go right exactly that's true sorrow we don't have exchanged. Now so what are what does she do about that this. Well I think they need need to sit down and in this process and say you know I've noticed maybe maybe there anything that I can do to alleviate distract the had a chance. Against you know an actual person how is lecture course. That's surely doesn't apply act differently is I started my dander up it's like you you're trying to intervene on my kids maybe she's like yeah she might also be trying to prove that she's a good strong arm yeah I see that's and I mean I think that's a great points thank you Pam. Not Tim's. You guys who do you. Well momma I'd an erstwhile. My first array elapsed killed. And I can say. China mom's perspective and you really are in the middle and shout you don't realize you're yelling match I ain't that. Grandma should change up I think she should shattered watered down and say look. You're really in the middle of you really yellow lot that they're a lot of laps. You're gonna match like. The latch type your daughter published due to wash our hair short hurt our the last time she actually put pressure air older mom should never get axed. You don't realize you don't get them back. Held are long gone and then eight years speaking ability and. Aaron Perry a year while yeah. You initial moment if you are too caught up in the middle of making sure that dinner at the clock all the laundry done and sure it's actually in. There's been no matter in the Adams. Wow thank Jim I like the way you phrased all that sat there were your words and presentation money it's. It really nice yeah I'm not coming from a like your yellow did you well. Are you telling her to more. Focus on the positive rather him cleaning out of her shortcomings immediately freeze it like you know when I got it all stressed out when I was in the situation I wouldn't say wouldn't Kim just absolute lay flowers is not better now is Edson this would be the first time Stephen I actually think they communicated in easy answer to know people it could just kill you for coming off the I'm Regina. Yeah I would you. So she definitely needs could see coming and here's why it takes a village serrated child. And I will never understand why age that he would pace ending to a total stranger about king standing are hurting your kids and I. But he would not pretending to be a person has started a love circle that you're supposed to be involved and. Tell a stranger can't deny you the child because a stranger can't. Know that I am and it's a stranger would marking a year KG would jump enemy like paid back offer whatever he would defend your daughter you would defend that grandchild. But Caroline daughter she's wondering if she needs to say something absolutely he's scared downing UK cash. Not in your tow years their mommy here's what I'm observing this kind of bothers me what are we thinking about that I absolutely. Especially if she knows that she's partly responsible for her daughter living in the habit to repeat the cycle you have to talk to her there's nothing about about it on the have to meet head. It's a all can be done in love nation actually needs to tie. What happens if the daughter gets vindictive. Denies her access kicks are out of the house in what happens for daughter does he need those things. Then that is all the more recourse for her to be involved because she's going to need to be a backbone for her grandkids too clearly can. Are not gonna get situation at the daughter's going to go that direction. I'm a mother of four I have a grandson. I had a great report my kids and I let them know that the towel at me and this is how I a rebuke. You raise your kid accordingly but if there's something I can't even stronger something that bothered me I have every right and responsibility to take tempting because it's my job. To help nurture that next generation. While Regina I could sell UT cure your business is a monsoon and that's. Hotels are active cells. I was around eating your kid algae what you said he did and it scared ever seen that again in Hollywood have to do is looking to him. I I was I don't know. And they're so used to his houses and they're like yeah whatever. Dad yeah. He should talk to her she loved her she loved that kid actually need to talk tour she's part of the village. Boat. Announcer it's our roster but that would that was amazing points. We're gonna keep this conversation going you guys on FaceBook or rock unit. If you wanna help Linda help these grandchildren. Talk to us their schedule and our soccer and Steve FaceBook page.
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