Slacker and Steve - OPP: Disability in His Family 6/28

Wednesday, June 28th

Candy has been with her boyfriend for 4 years now and they’ve been talking about marriage and kids. Her brother-in-law just had a baby who was born with a disability that is hereditary and there’s a chance that her boyfriend could pass it along to their baby as well. Candy admits to not wanting to devote the rest of her life to caring for someone and is questioning if she wants have a baby with him now. Is this something worth ending the relationship over?


Transcript - Not for consumer use. Robot overlords only. Will not be accurate.

And the sometimes. We did tasked with some of making decisions that are bigger than I think we should be allowed to make yeah Amazon's relieves you really is kind of big and she's just because it's such a major decision she's decided to change your name and use voice disguised herself candy. Yeah are you guys are very calm. Tell us what's going on in how we can help you through creator don't. Oh how high banks but I'll. Pay if so my inauguration and is I have I have a wonderful boyfriend we've been together for several years. But we and we look we got a very much. We talked about you know getting married a long term having family and I don't know really aboard what are quiet. His brother. And the big do you look forward with some very who blew the ability. Arm the way and they you know they do it half and everything electric about. The and it's it's become trombone genetic disability if that Ryder Internet. Are my boyfriend's brother her blood and that central basically. It means that my portrait could be clear here. And it. All freaked me out OK because we. Knew we wanted to cute but it. Yeah you know every bit hurt I don't wanna grow it what it all involved but it's just who would be your stuff. Is it is it profound enough so OK yeah I think you canning its profound enough that the child will be. With the parents. Forever and that. And I think there forever and just you know it'll just be like opening and not glowing you know arm. And you know we talked about cared so much and had envisioned a future bit late I did not envision that future and that. Now you either at bat. Well and that his Bentley baked. That's a real possibility for them and I I don't know that I am who quit you know that they're a lifelong Patricia. I mean there's a lot of people who who didn't think Syracuse for that and they have a profoundly disabled child when they signed an inner strength. On any finally threw it do you. But I don't I don't wanna beat that. More durable wanna be that K period no I don't I don't want among my life an re lying you know 2.5 cared little. There are just. And candy. You kind of an open of put a luxurious position because a lot of parents don't have the luxury of we may have their child and boom it's already did that decision was made for them yes and you kind of came. You know and how. And can make the decision before yes there's a possibility that he can have a kid it's normal may be. Even smoked. I mean my you know my boyfriend and gave Brodeur normal although it. I mean a true hero like generation before that who doesn't pumping that that that happens that it doesn't help. And I just I just I. I have to interrupt you I hate the fact and I said the word normal laws that we did I just what are you playing in quotes were you you just jealous this call him or her disappearance conversation. Not profoundly disabled. Equals normal armed. So am I think they're probably all. Rallying around the brother and everything right now so you touch your boyfriend about this at all or read the first. You know it's cute it's really it's just so early and that everybody really into every once in a supportive and you know I'm being deported Q I'm trying to how but it just split. Huge yeah I mean I can't burden. You know all my boyfriend with with being here a bit because you do right now nick bell confirmed orders probably are. Arm. So he's taken the same thing to. You're my you're now he might be. You have to let it just means so raw and don't do it. Doesn't look to dust settle. On their situation before you can bring up your six OK so let's pretend we just asked ordered how do we bring them out like. So about your brother's kid I've been thinking maybe we shouldn't think I don't even know what's the next. It's time to talk Realogy it's time it's on the family histories our summit talks fell. I am glad you know I've I've always I've wanted to hit and a walk into your blood Emma. All of them both not just why do we care bill and I got to tell you why it nobody should. It has been the culprit in theory so. Let's let's bring you some advice for let me ask you a couple questions if if let's save that that test exists say you can go get tested and he can get tested. And it's a fifty's it's it's a 50% or greater chance that he could have a profoundly disabled child. What you do what's your number are you are you. Are you you know leave or you know adopts what are you what are you owe somebody 520. You know we have. And Laura I'm. I don't know I mean you or pictured going live sort of conventional well you know I think our hidden but I do. I don't know that I could repel them. Yeah important. Yeah. What are you. So. Then are we making a decision. As she you whether or not you have kids are we making a decision as to whether or not you stay with temporary what decision are we trying to reach by the end of oh PP today. In here and you wanna be a mom. Mom used music trump Stephen Weiss. Them. I feel like I'm kind of approaching route yeah are pretty approaching. The pleasure. You you want kids. I grew you I don't know what to. I mean I don't. I don't blame you for being honest enough to say I don't think I can handle. That Clinton and your feelings are validating at all I mean it's but. You're asking a very serious question there are people listening have profoundly disabled kids are probably mad at you right now brave to reach. Maybe get past that and get it be helpful imprint would do when you find out there suns hang on candy. I give her vision of what is don't I don't know what can she do now that she knows there's some genetic markers in the family that couldn't like. Two days ago it's night we're going to have shows we're gonna lead and now she knows agreement done now it's not gonna be think there's a chance it won't be that. This does she have a right what if she does what should she say or should she just. If she truly wants the go the better I stick to the pass or stick to the player finds somebody that has a better shot at making your plan or that he. Held candy out if you had any advice we'd love to hear from you emeritus. Yeah hey guys who do you think. Though are book and Alomar graduate edit you know. It. Might have an enemy we have a disabled child. My neither are my husband and I are carriers are what my child had. Really good does aid. Freak thing that happens you really can't. Make that if they've been they've gone back. They why you had not yet they why did genetic testing go to the hospital surgeon added that that help with that and that you know. What does she do if it comes back to he's got a 70% chance of passing whatever it is Jean is that yeah brother did. And they need to have a conversation and the Connecticut couldn't help them my track it you know and you know maybe they may. Go off and on traditional route to where they can kind of look at the gene I you know there are things they can do. Designer he's having a I don't know Emanuel loans because they're they may be part of Nutting and it don't even know what the 70% possibility thoughts. He may not even I haven't seen it as a band and trouble free airport and Rae Carruth that's you know look so. You know she's trying to make a bit bigger and right now are that not having any knot winds. Love my my that they put it you know joy in my life partner here absolutely. Aren't here hurting. Absolutely. But third joys that come with that skill and he'd be happy you can't I know. Even no egos do surgery although there's not run you go don't know what it's doing is still going to come out of it. And it could bet someone you actually lawless. And that's what you need to think about you know it that you want him gap was saying she needed to home. It seems like she loves him but doesn't isn't ready to she's not ready to tackle take on what you are taking on in tackling. So I didn't wanna pig aren't terribly either but I didn't and I am bored kids after him. No he's not playing. You roll the dice again after wow. Mean I know that sounds weird but I don't. And number ever get cap. So. Who did say that chair hurt my dorm on earth regular are not normal but that you determined you are typical like they're real. Our typical Mac it's a total disaster and we knew we were saying when what the first semi semi normal I was the only outcome I'm gonna be a hero. Well they need in order to get a repeat the term child. It takes you honestly no served for the advice and down enlightenment enlightenment for sure this exact. Yeah yeah what do you think CIA night. I think she should look more in depth and see what they're expect collector not because that's going to be huge factor who can architects blink. That's that's a big difference in something that is not excellent. The percentage which can't be gaining as much I hear the sex points. And then also look on one side the bloodline Oakmont on a well because manner Dominic Miller stepped up. So to name. But then again it sounds like this eight and all of a sudden we're making a cut she you guys it's like I love you forever. But let's go in and we're gonna we're gonna have our pros and con side were never a little chart that says if it's this and it's that. This these bizarre probabilities. And then I decide whether on a going to procreate with you. And. I wouldn't yeah I would think within the spreadsheets into that more so it's just Q. If there are willing if they're willing to say OK that's. You know this district okay at least be a little prepared for news much you know recent possible yet exactly don't think that it's a terming factor determine Yasser no. Isolated from the condition and that and then when you look at the genetic so that you can decide OK what what are real risk here and. Where you know more than anybody should you know listening to the Shelvin thank you for the concept here's my thing. For me as the primary female on the show because I have a ton of masters and now he's touched every ounce from its like. I want to grow older just let my happily ever after and now he's turning into a science experiment basically you buy that's all biological now this is but. What's going into. There's it's none because it's so bio logic isn't really any surprise to just to go designed to be I was right jeans and resolve medical met medicinal. Nagin. Yeah hey you guys. And well I think he's actually really personal. And sensitive topic my AM. My best friend and her husband are both genetic carriers her eight fatal disease and they lost their daughter last year. A couple months after they found out that I was pregnant with twins. When I found out that my son on how to feel birth defect and they he passed away in the December time. He didn't developed kidney is so when he was in the alone. And we'd had a lot says testing done and there's nothing genetic. And all it just kind of have to end but I've seen somebody genetic and I seen it myself not. I think if you love of trying to Egypt still. Yet I am I think it sells data and then then there's methods like I. I think very. Method that they can do testing and I don't know if that's an option for this situation but there are medical treatment up there. While Merriam. I'm so sorry process thanks for sharing what. Through them. We do appreciate you sharing and and hopefully candy still listening right you may be you're helping her make the decision machines to make we appreciate it. Yeah and do you think is the I don't want or think about the other guy. She leaves him and then she can't get pregnant what and she's my local in the next. Pregnant man and all carry a baby and then why is he without her love and Pino. Oh Mara are a lot means what this but we had men do that and we all women think he's a pig. Per leaving her for not being fertile but. He isn't in the end Friday. If you like bonds and he's allowed to resume attractive and LAT and T once I I know it's your your Grassley right we are car it's just. It's such an key thing to say but it's like this what I've won in my home ice but I wanna have us a sampling. In it's you can't or your family film I can still while what I want and what can I go somewhere else and a hey guys. Oh I think that she should get genetic testing because she'd ever felt she could be carrier some. Something either true there are you where accused prepared for example of her. Boyfriend we're out of 75% chance. He could have thought of that respect it as well but how bad she unaware that's true and the other thing is choose their loved let her get beat up there as he did Kerry did they tell it how. Well it's public they're all just been a different Warner is it. There's definitely oh we will we'll Livan it takes you this car and a wee little world where there's options. More than. There's a lot of ways it's joy I never lack or that's where you gain you make sure you get this gene in there and gene and then she can carry it and then. Jill. Yeah I. Be able our mother is a crapshoot at night I don't think she's ready to take that risk it doesn't sound like it. So I think the decisions need to make is is this spending and who gonna walk with me regard to Mo. Great advice great tips we appreciate it you guys are getting hot you guys are getting what else. So let's take all that anger and maybe turn it into constructive Gaza be cool because it is angry obviously ratcheted up we'll be in this yeah. If you still wanna chat or as Steve says mix it up to hit up the slacker and Steve FaceBook page.